Yugioh:Not Mentally Sane
by Bella Shia
Summary: A strange tale of an insane Kaiba, a demented Yugi and an obsessed Duke... WAY ooc.
1. Escape,Obbsession and Money

Chapter One: Escape, Obsession and Money

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-gi-oh.

* * *

Mokuba woke to the smell of something cooking. _Huh? Who's cooking? _He wondered. He knew the chefs didn't start making breakfast for a while. He also heard the sound of someone singing. _No one in this house sings_...

The younger Kaiba went to the staircase and saw his brother wearing a huge white chef's hat and a frilly pink apron that said 'Kiss the cook'. Mokuba also saw Kaiba was the source of the singing.

"I feel good... na na na na na na.. I knew that I would... na na na na na na"

Wide eyed, Mokuba tried to quietly sneak back up the stairs, but Kaiba spun around in mid song. "Mokuba!" He greeted, "Pancakes are ready!" flipping it in the pan as he spoke, like in the old movies.

Mokuba slowly took a seat, staring as Kaiba continued to sing and twirled a glass as he set it down on the table.

"Uh, Seto, are you feeling okay?" Mokuba asked.

Kaiba tilted his head quizzically. "Yes of course!"

"I beg to differ..." Mokuba muttered.

Kaiba didn't seem to hear, peering at his watch. "Time for school!" he said in a sing song voice.

"Seto, I think you should skip today."

"Why?" Kaiba asked.

"Well I don't know if you're okay…you know…mentally." Mokuba admitted.

"Nonsense! I'm sane as ever." Kaiba argued.

"Seto I don't think-" but Kaiba interrupted, screaming "YOU CAN'T KEEP ME HERE!", running out the door like a idiot.

**At school:**  
Yami, (Yami has his own body, by the way) Tea, Joey, Tristan, and Bakura stood outside Yugi's locker, waiting for Yugi.

"Does anyone know where Duke is?" Tea asked.

"I haven't seen him." Bakura said.

"He's probably sick." Joey said with a shrug.

**Meanwhile:**  
Duke was standing outside a local store, shaking a top hat "Please, can you spare a chopstick kind sir, or you, ma'am? How about you pretty lady?" he asked, earning a slap across the face. "I guess she didn't have a chopstick" Duke mumbled, dazed, his cheek red.

For fifteen long minutes he asked for chopsticks, not receiving even one. In his desperation, he latched on to a mans leg.

"GET OFF ME YOU FREAK!" The man screamed.

"Not until you give me a chopstick!" Duke yelled.

The man grabbed a hose (that just happened to be right there) spraying Duke with the frigid water, causing him to let go of the mans leg.

Spitting out some water, Duke yelled triumphantly "Water! That gives me a great idea!" running down the sidewalk, kicking his legs up, looking like a lunatic and tripping over his own feet. He casually got up, and kept running in the same fashion.

**Back at school:  
**They were still waiting around by Yugi's locker, Yugi no where to be found, when Kaiba came bursting through the door, running like an absolute moron.

BOOM.

Kaiba had run straight into the wall.

"Kaiba," Yami asked slowly "Are you on drugs?"

"No." Kaiba answered simply.

"Then are you _off _drugs?" Tea asked.

"_Tea_" Tristan said (Joey was laughing very hard, quite enjoying the fact Kaiba just ran into the wall)

"What?" Tea asked.

Tristan shook his head.

Kaiba got up and started walking down the hall, singing Baby One More Time. "My loneliness is killing me... and I... I must confess, I still believe."

They could only stare at Kaiba as he disappeared down the hall, singing, Joey now literally roll on the floor in laughter.

Then Yugi popped out of no where, dawning a black shirt, black pants, and a bunch of scull and spiked jewelry. His hair was in an even crazier style that usual, and dyed a blood red.

Joey stopped in mid laugh.

"YUGI WHAT DID YOU DO?" They screamed in unison.

"I'm being evil... I'm tired of being good." Yugi said simply.

Tea thrust her head upwards dramatically. "Yugi, you're breaking my heart! You're going down a path I can not follow." and started running. She ran to the roof and jumped off, and died. (Or so it seemed. Mu ha ha ha?)

"Oh look, cookies!" Yami said, as it so happened there was a bake sale a little down the hall.

"Yay!" Yugi said, and started eating.

"Uhh... does anyone care Tea is dead?" Tristan asked

"No." Joey said simply, eating cookies with Bakura.

"Cookie?" Bakura asked, politely offering a large oatmeal and raisin cookie.

"Sure!" Tristan said, taking it.

Yami smirked and said to Yugi "Evil people don't eat cookies."

Yugi gave Yami a defiant look, sticking out his chin "Nu-uh. Evil people can eat cookies too."

"They can not." Yami argued.

"Fine. I'll be evil again as soon as I'm done eating cookies." Yugi said brightly.

Yami rolled his eyes. "Whatever…"

"You know, we should really be in class." Bakura reminded them, proceeding to class with the others at his heels.

A bit later, Mokuba came running in the school with a rather large net.

Bakura, whom just so happened to be on his way to the bathroom, stopped and stared. "Mokuba, is there a reason for the net?"

"I'm looking for Seto. He escaped, and he was acting really weird at breakfast. I'm worried he might hurt himself... or someone else. Will you help me look for him?"

"Sorry, I really can't..." Bakura started to say, but had a change of heart when Mokuba pulled out his rather thick wallet.

"There's money in it if you help me!" Mokuba smirked.

The dollar sign gleamed in Bakura's eyes. "But now I can!" he said quickly, lunging at the wad of bills. "Cha-Ching" he said gleefuly, stuffing the money in his pocket and following Mokuba.


	2. Chopsticks, Orange Soda and Spoons

Chapter Two Chopsticks, Orange soda, and Spoons

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-gi-oh. Or any lyrics I use.

* * *

Duke pulled a back ski mask over his face, a white bag in one hand, and a small, plastic blue water gun in the other. He burst through the door of a Chinese fast-food restaurant. He brandished his water gun. "Nobody moves, nobody gets hurt!" he yelled, dashing over to the counter where they kept the chopsticks. He stuffed as many as he could in his bag, when the manager walked over, thoroughly confused.

"You asked for it!" Duke said, and spayed the manager, leaving a tiny wet dot on the man's shirt. Quickly, Duke dived out the near by window, running down the street screaming "YES, I have chopsticks!"

A passerby heard Duke's shout, as did everyone else in a 5 mile radius, and took hold of Dukes arm. "Let go of me crazy lady!" Duke shouted.

"You need to see me. I am a therapist, and you, young man, most certainly need therapy."

"Therapy?" Duke asked. He broke into a grin. "Sounds fun!" he said, walking in a funny way, not exactly skipping but there was a kind of spring in his step.

**At school:  
**"Hey, do you hear that?" Joey asked.

"Yeah." Tristan said

"Sounds like it's coming from the cafeteria" Yami added, and they all hastened towards the cafeteria. (Bakura was still somewhere looking for Kaiba with Mokuba) and were greeted by very strange sight.

Seto Kaiba was standing on a cafeteria table, drinking a bottle of orange soda, which was half empty.

Four empty bottles laid by his feet, and people were chanting "Chug Chug Chug!"

"What's going on?!" Yami asked.

A girl turned around excitedly. "Kaiba is chugging Orange Soda! When he's done..." she trailed off, leaving the soda's effects to imagination.

"Man, they should have news reporters here!" someone called out.

As if on cue, Rex Raptor and Weevil Underwood came running down the hall in suits, both had microphones and ear thingies, followed in by a news camera.

"I'm Rex Raptor" Rex announce into the camera.

"- and I'm Weevil Underwood -" Weevil added.

"- and we're reporting from Domino High, where Seto Kaiba is chugging orange soda. He's already finished four bottles!" Rex reported.

"How many can he finish? We'll have to wait and see." Weevil finished.

Yami stared at Rex and Weevil, who must have given up their pathetic dueling career. "Weirdness" he muttered to himself.

"Seto Kaiba... sugar high?" Tristan asked in shock. (Joey was a helpless heap of laughter on the floor)

Kaiba finished his fifth soda bottle, stumbling off the table and falling face first onto the floor. The crowd gave groans of disgust as Kaiba puked.

"Come on, we have to help him." Tristan said.

Joey stopped in mid laugh (again) "_We_ have to help him?" Joey asked.

"Yes Joey... darn it where's Yugi when I need him..."

At this, Yugi popped in out of no where "I'm right here! But I am evil. Bwahahahaha... Darn I have to work on my evil laugh…" and with that, Yugi disappeared.

Yami, Joey and Tristan all stared in silence for a bit. "Come on Yami back me up" Tristan pleaded, trying to pick up Kaiba, who needed support to be able to walk.

"Fine, but I am definitely not cleaning up his puke."

Yami, Joey, and Tristan finally got Kaiba to his mansion. "Seto don feel so good" Kaiba said, throwing up.

"Oh god get him away from me." Joey said.

They knocked, hoping Kaiba wouldn't throw up again.

Mokuba, who had a bit earlier given up on his search for Kaiba, had been pacing in front of the front door, waiting for Kaiba to return. He opened the front door quickly, staring. "What happened?" Mokuba asked, wrinkling his nose at the sight and smell of Kaiba's vomit.

"Kaiba's sugar high… orange soda." Tristan explained lamely.

"Thanks guys." Mokuba said, heaving Kaiba into the house. As the three left they could hear Mokuba saying: "Seto! You should know better than that!" to which Kaiba responded "Aw.. you never let me have any fun..."

**Later:  
**Mokuba walked into the kitchen to see Kaiba sitting on the floor, in the mist of... "Spoons? Seto, why are you sitting with all these spoons?" Mokuba asked.

"All these spoons but no forks!!" Kaiba wailed, throwing his arms out.

"Seto, the forks are probably just in the dishwasher."

"WHAT?!" Kaiba screamed and ran off, coming back with a baseball bat. "GIVE ME BACK MY FORKS YOU EVIL DISHWASHER!" he screamed, beating the dishwasher with the bat until it was only a crumpled heap of metal.

Then he gathered up the forks and disappeared again, coming back wearing yellow rubber gloves, his pink apron, and a hair net. He filled a bucket with soapy water and started washing the forks, singing Complicated.

"Why'd ya have to go and make things so complicated?" Then, still singing, he started to count them, when he suddenly stopped. "We have 15 forks, but I only count 14... ONE'S MISSING!!!"

Mokuba walked over and started to count them "Seto, you counted wrong, there _are_ 15 forks."

"LIES!" Kaiba screamed "YOU WANT POOR FORKIE TO GO MISSING FOREVER, DON'T YOU, YOU EVIL FORK HATER! I KNEW YOU NEVER LIKED FORKIE!" he screamed.

"Forkie…? Seto, there honestly are 15 forks!" Mokuba said, but Kaiba clearly wasn't listening.

"I'LL FIND YOU FORKIE!!" he said, and he started humming the Mission Impossible theme, throwing himself up against a wall.


	3. More Chopsticks, the Vegi Man, and Dolls

Chapter Three More chopsticks, Cursed Veggie Man, and Dolls

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-gi-oh.

**_Thank you_**, to those who've reviewed. Reviews make me very happy!

* * *

Sitting on one of those odd shaped couches therapist have, Duke hummed to himself as the therapist took a seat in her chair.

"My name is Dr. Finklemeyer. How about I start by showing you ink blots? Tell me what you see when you look at them."

Duke nodded with vigor.

Dr. Finklemeyer showed him the first ink blot.

"Chopsticks!"

Dr. Finklemeyer looked at the blot and blinked. "… Okay …" she said at last, showing him the next ink block.

"Chopsticks." Duke said again.

She showed him a third, fourth and fifth ink block, in all of which he saw chopsticks. "...I believe time to try a different test" she told him, forcing a smile.

Duke pouted " But that game was fun."

"I'm going to read you words off a list, and you tell me what word pops into your head."

"OK!" Duke said, happy to be playing a new game.

"Hot." she read off.

"Chopsticks." Duke responded.

"Cold."

"Chopsticks."

"Sun."

"Chopsticks."

"STOP SAYING CHOPSTICKS!" Dr. Finklemeyer screamed.

"But you told me to say what word pops into my head, and chopsticks popped into my head every time." Duke said. "I love chopsticks!" He murmured, stroking a random chopstick he pulled out of his pocket.

"Do you like anything else beside chopsticks?"

"Yup. Chap stick and Chinese food!"

"Why do you like chap stick?" she asked him, sighing with forced patience.

"Because, chap stick _rhymes_ with chopstick, and I like Chinese food because you eat it with chopsticks" Duke explained.

"DO YOU CARE ABOUT ANYTHING BESIDES CHOPSTICKS?"

"No." Duke said, in a tone that showed he clearly wondered what else is there to care about.

"Do you realize you are obsessed with chopsticks?" she asked.

"Of course." Duke bobbed his head.

"Good... recognition is the first step to solving the problem."

"It's not a problem." Duke defended. "If you were obsessed with chopsticks too, you'd be much happier!"

She started banging her head on her desk.

"That looks like fun!" Duke said, and started banging his head on the desk as well.

**At the Kaiba Mansion:  
**Kaiba struggled against handcuffs as Mokuba successfully locked them around Kaiba's wrist.

"Why are you doing this to me?" Kaiba demanded.

"Because, you have to eat your vegetables." Mokuba told him.

"NEVER!" Kaiba yelled.

"Come on, Seto." Mokuba said, holding out a bowl of peas. "You never know, you might like them, and I have more in case you do." Mokuba added, pointing to a bag of frozen peas.

"You can not make me eat those peas of destruction! Gasp! I know who you are! You're the Cursed Veggie Man!" Kaiba screamed dramatically.

"Well, you won't get any other food until you eat your vegetables." Mokuba answered in final tones.

"I will never give in to you, Cursed Veggie Man! I'll starve before I eat your stinkin' peas."

Mokuba simply shook his head and left, but as he did, he accidently dropped the key to his brother's handcuffs. Kaiba, however, didn't notice.

Kaiba rocked back and fourth slowly, starting to sing to pass the time. He sang the Weird Al version of American Pie; The Saga Begins.

"My, my this here Anakin guy may be Vader someday later, now he's just a small fry. He left his home and kissed his mommy good-bye saying soon I'm gonna be a Jedi... soon I'm gonna be a Jedi... Did you know this junkyard slave isn't even old enough to shave? But he can use the force they say… Did you see him hitting on the queen, though he's just 9 and she's 14? Yeah he's probably gonna marry her someday…"

Suddenly, Kaiba stopped his singing as something shiny caught his attention (the way something shiny always does) _It's a key_ he realized _but to what? _

Kaiba picked it up, saying to himself "Hey, I bet I can pick the lock on the handcuffs with this!" Successfully unlocking the handcuffs, he grinned with pleasure. "Ha, I'm a genus! I took a useless key and used it to set me free!"

Taking a handful of peas (for bait to catch the Cursed Veggie Man, of course) and started to run.

Kaiba ran out of the house, pausing in the middle of the road to loudly proclaim "Just try and catch me now Cursed Veggie Man!"

A police car came to a halt next Kaiba, "Stop!" the cop called.

In his shock, Kaiba did.

"Do you have any idea how dangerous it is to be in the _middle_ of the road?"

"Not as dangerous by being caught by..." Kaiba paused a moment, to add dramatic effect "…the Cursed Veggie Man!"

"The … Cursed Veggie Man?" The police man asked in a disbelieving tone.

"Yes!" Kaiba said.

"I think you should come with me." the cop said offhandedly.

"Why?" Kaiba asked.

"I believe you might be in need of a mental home." the police man said.

"But I already _have_ a home." Kaiba replied as he was forced in the car.

**At the mall: **  
"Why are we here again, Joey?" Yami asked.

"I need ta get a birthday gift for Serenity" Joey explained

"I don't mean to sound rude, but why do you need us here for that?" Bakura asked.

"Well, I wanna get her somethin' good, so I was hopin' you guys could help."

They had looked in several of the stores when, quite suddenly, Mokuba dashed through the door, gasping for air and talking very, very fast. "Hi. Listen, Seto never eat his vegetables, and today I tried to make Seto eat vegetables, and I had to handcuffed him, but he still wouldn't eat them, and he called me the Cursed Veggie Man!"

Mokuba paused quickly to take a breath "and not he's gone! You have to help me", he could be anywhere!" he finished, looking at Bakura in particular.

They all stared back blankly, needing time to figure out what Mokuba said.

"So...why did you come to Bakura?" Joey asked.

"Cause Bakura will help." Mokuba answered simply.

"Why does Mokuba think he will-" Tristan began to ask Joey quietly, but stopped as he watched Mokuba pull out a good amount of money and handed it to Bakura.

"That's why." Joey said.

"That dude's smart." Tristan muttered, watching Bakura following Mokuba. They left the store, continuing shopping.

Joey finally decided on getting his sister a pretty music box that played her favorite song. They were about to head out of the mall when they heard someone the toy store snarl "What do they mean? That looks nothing like me!"

Doubling back, they discovered Alister, clutching a box of cherry Popsicles, staring at a Darth Vader action figure.

"Got that right... That doll has a shirt." Yami pointed out dryly, as Alister's shirt looked a lot more like a sports bra than a real shirt.

Joey sniggered.

"It isn't a _doll_! It's an _action figure_!" Alister corrected hotly. "And it's an action figure of me!" Alister grabbed a cherry Popsicle from the box. "I have a light saber and I'm not afraid to use it!" he said, and started running, completely ignoring Yami's remark of "Dude, that's a Popsicle, not a light saber."

Alister ran towards the dude in a Darth Vader costume (there was a sale on Star War toys) and tackled him. "How dare you try to impostor me!" Alister yelled, yanking the costume off the poor emplyee and running yet again.

Alister quickly put the costume on outside the mall, running down the street in a very giddy way.

The same cop that was driving Kaiba then stopped Alister. "Why are you in a Darth Vader costume?" the police man asked

"Because, I am Darth Vader" Alister explained, brandishing his cherry Popsicle for effect. "Now move before I hurt you with my light saber-" but he had his 'light saber' for so long it had melted almost entirely and fell off the stick.

"Uh..." Alister lost no time in pulling a second out of the box, but that was melted too. He attempted to run into the near by ice cream shop to get another cherry Popsicle, but the police man had already gotten out of the car and grabbed Alister's arms.

The cop forced Alister into the car along with Kaiba "The two of you are going to a mental home!" the cop sad forcefully.


	4. Sugar and Mental Homes

Chapter Four Sugar and Mental Homes

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-gi-oh.

Again, a big **_thank you _**to all who reviewed.

* * *

Joey, Tristan, Yami, and Bakura were walking home from the mall after a very strange experience with Alister, when Marik pulled up on his motorcycle. "Yo Pharaoh!" Marik called. 

Yami turned around, while the others simply kept walking. "What?" Yami asked coldly.

"Hey." Marik pouted. "I wasn't that bad! All I did was send a bunch of people to the shadow realm and mind controlled a bunch of other people and tried to send you to the shadow realm so I can take over the world... Who wouldn't?"

Yami just stared.

Marik rolled his eyes "Ishizu made me take anger management classes..." he said, sounding moody. "Anyways, you want in or not?" Marik asked.

"Whaddya mean?" Yami asked.

Marik's eyes glinted. "Are you down to come with me and jack some sugar?"

Yami's eyes glinted as well. "I'm in!"

**At mental institution:  
**Kaiba and Alister sat in the room they were given, staring as a man lead Duke in.

"Hi." said Duke.

"Hi." said Kaiba.

"Hi." said Alister.

There was silence, for ten minutes no one said a word.

"CHOPSTICKS!" Duke screamed suddenly.

Kaiba and Alister looked at Duke. "He's one of us!" they both confirmed with glee.

"What now?" Kaiba asked.

"Lets dance the conga!" Duke said.

"Why?" Kaiba asked.

Duke shrugged. "It sounds like fun?"

So they all did.

The fourth man in the cell, a stranger, interrupted their dancing by addressing Kaiba. "Hey, bro-" but Kaiba stopped him, saying "Do not call me 'bro'... I am not your brother."

Alister bore a smug look. "No, but I am your father!"

"NOOOOOOOO... hey, wait, you're not my father." Kaiba said after a sudden realization.

Alister pouted.

"So, I'm here cuz I'm obsessed with chopsticks." Duke spoke up conversationally. "You?"

"I dunno... I was just running from the Cursed Veggie Man..." Kaiba explained.

"I'm Darth Vader!" Alister said.

Kaiba crossed his arms stubbornly. "Have you jumped in a volcano?"

"Well... No…" Alister admitted.

"Then you're not Darth Vader! You're only Vader after you jump in a volcano." Kaiba said matter-of-factly.

Alister looked like he was about to cry.

"Then we gotta break outta here to find Alister a volcano!" Duke said in a final tone.

They all nodded in agreement, and Alister did what could have only been a "I'm-going-to-jump-into-a-volcano-after-I-break-out-of-my-mental-home-so-I-can-become-Darth-Vader" dance.

"I have a plan." Kaiba announced dramatically.

He pulled out the frozen peas he had on him. Duke and Alister gasped.

Kaiba then pulled out the slingshot from his back pocket. (He always carried a slingshot in his back pocket. Duh.) He shot peas until, surprisingly, the wall broke down.

"YAY!!!" they all screamed.

**Meanwhile:  
**Marik and Yami arrived at an odd building. Yami gasped as he entered, jerking his head in all directions. (Which, with that hair of his, is fairly dangerous) Everywhere there was tons and tons of… "SUGAR!!!" Yami screamed, running to some cotton candy.

Marik pushed Yami's arm down. Yami gazed at him angrily. "Dude, it's sugar. Let me eat my sugar."

"Hey man, we're Egyptian." Marik said, smirking as he tossed him a jar of honey.

"Awesome!" Yami yelled with enthusiasm.

"Ready?"

"Ready!" Yami said, as they both furiously began eating honey at top speed. The honey was gone all too soon, and Yami stared mournfully into his now empty jar.

"Don't worry, just eat something else." Marik said in an oddly dreamy tone.

Indeed, they simply moved on to another sweet. After all, there was a whole room of sugar.

**Back to the mental 3:  
**Kaiba, Alister and Duke were running down the street together, Alister humming the Imperial March.

"Can you fly?" Duke asked Kaiba at random.

"Of course I can fly." Kaiba responded.

"Nu-uh… you can't fly." Duke said childishly.

"Yes I can." Kaiba argued.

"Nu-uh!"

"Yeah-huh!"

"Nu-huh!"

"Yeah-huh!"

"Nu-uh!"

"Yeah-huh!"

(3 hours later…)

"He's over there!" Bakura called to Joey, and both started running after Kaiba.

Mokuba was busy searching the other half of the town. Joey had tagged along with Bakura because he was bored. (Yami couldn't be found since he was busy eating sugar with Marik, and Tristan had a sewing class.)

"Nu-uh!" Duke was still arguing.

"Yeah-huh! I can prove it!" Kaiba said.

"Okay!"

So, Kaiba ran to the top of a tall building, and jumped. Luckily his pants got caught on a telephone poll, so he survived.

"He flew!" Duke said with awe.

Duke and Alister quickly began clapping.

Bakura let out an intense sigh of relief. It'd be a serious cut in his pay if Kaiba died. He pulled out his cell phone. "Mokuba, we found him!" he said quickly, and hung up.

Kaiba fell from the poll, and his pants ripped, revealing red boxers imprinted with blue eyes white dragon's on them.

"Not surprising..." Duke noted.

Bakura looked away. "I did not need to see that." he said.

Kaiba looked extremely dazed. "Oh hello... who are you all?" he asked, pulling up his pants.

A look went from Alister to Duke to Joey to Tristan (he had just come out of his sewing class, which was conveniently located right there.) to Bakura "Mokuba is going to kill me..." Bakura muttered.

Joey took a step towards Kaiba "I'm Joey... you know, da one you call 3rd rank duelist."

Kaiba blinked, not remembering. "Who am I?" he asked.

"Seto Kaiba you're da-" but he stopped, beaming as if a light bulb appeared over his head.

Joey gave an evil smirk. "You're Seto Kaiba, the hillbilly, and you're late for your family reunion!"

Meanwhile:

Yami was bouncing up and down along with Marik, as they both were clearly very sugar high.

"Sugar! Sugar! Sugar! Sugar! Sugar! Sugar!" The two chanted in unison.

Yami was about to eat a chocolate bar when Marik stopped him.

"A chocolate bar? That's for babies, we can handle more sugar that that!" Marik said, grabbing two bags of pure sugar.

He passed one to Yami, both quickly tearing the bag open.

"3, 2, 1, Go!" They said at the same time, instantly chugging the sugar.

**Back to Kaiba:  
**"I'm missing a family reunion!" Kaiba yelped. "Oh boy I better get down there right away!" he added, suddenly wearing overalls, a straw hat and no shoes.

"Kaiba's a hillbilly?" Alister asked Duke in surprise.

Duke shrugged. "Must be." quickly following Kaiba, who was running.

Suddenly a limo pulled up and Mokuba hoped out. "Where's Seto?" He demanded instantly.

"He went that way." Joey responded, pointing.

"Why?"

"Joey told him he was a hillbilly..." Tristan explained.

Mokuba stared. "He believed that?"

Bakura winced. "Well... yes. He came down with amnesia..."

Mokuba's left eye twitched. "So you told him he was a hillbilly, Joey?"

Joey said nothing, but his laughter gave him away.

"JOEY!!" Mokuba screamed, tackling him.

"We gotta help Joey!" Tristan said, alarmed.

"But Mokuba's only half his size." Bakura reasoned.

"Yeah, but he's winning!"

And so he was...


	5. Sugar High Pharaohs and Road Trip

Chapter Five: Sugar High Pharaoh and Road Trip

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-gi-oh.

Once again, THANKS to my reviews. Cookies for all of chuu!

* * *

Bakura and Tristan pulled Mokuba off Joey. 

Mokuba furiously fought against their grip. "MY BROTHER THINKS HE'S A HILLBILLY! YOU'RE GOING DOWN!" Mokuba screamed, desperately trying to get at Joey.

"Calm down Mokuba, we'll find Kaiba." Bakura assured the enraged boy.

Mokuba took several deep breaths. "Fine. We're all looking for him until we find him."

**Yami and Marik:  
**Yami drained the last of the sugar from the bag.

"There's no more sugar!" Marik said, alarmed. The pair had alread cleared out the rooms stock.

"What?!?! No more?" Yami yelped.

"We'll find some!" Marik said.

Yami nodded and they both urgently ran out.

**Back to Mokuba:  
**Tristan scratched his head. "I can't help but feel we're forgetting something..."

"Yeah, I feel that way too" Joey said.

"You need to find Yami" Yugi said in his most mystical voice, popping out of nowhere.

"Hey what are you doin' here?" Joey asked.

Yugi put his hands on his hips. "Well I needed to do _something_... Evil's actually kind of boring. And Yami's missing, not that you noticed."

Joey blinked. "You're right…"

"So, does anyone know where Yami is?" Bakura asked.

Everyone shrugged guilty, not knowing.

**Yami and Marik:  
**"Lets go to the grocery store!" Yami suggested.

Marik shook his, clearing having withdrawal.. "Too. Far. Away. NEED! SUGAR!" he started bouncing again.

Yami nodded, racing down the street with Marik behind him.

Yami skidded to a stop and Marik followed suit.

"Hey, that was fun!" Yami said with glee. "I'm gunna do it again!"

"NO!" Marik objected. "I want sugar! Why are we here?"

Yami blinked, thinking.

Marik grabbed a rather large stick, thwacking Yami across the head with it.

"What was that for?!" Yami demanded.

"To help you think." Marik responded earnestly.

"Oh. Okay..."

"Did it work?" Marik asked.

"No... Maybe it will work if you do it again!" Yami said.

"Okay!" Marik hit him again.

"I got it! We were going to Yugi's room because he hid some sugar from me in his room somewhere!"

"YAY!!"

Yami lead the way into Yugi's room and the two attacked, pulling out draws and throwing random things everywhere. Marik yanked opened a draw to see Yugi's Care Bear boxers.

"Okay... ew." Marik said, slamming the draw shut.

Yami had torn the sheets of Yugi's bed and before a minute was up they had gone through Yugi's entire room.

"What now?" Marik asked.

Yami blinked, pondering this, when Mokuba came up the stairs.

"Get in the bus." Mokuba ordered harshly.

Yami was confused, and not just because he was sugar high.

Mokuba roughly grabbed Yami by the wrist, leaving Marik.

Mokuba shoved Yami into the bus he had rented so they could all look for his elder brother. "Step on it!" Mokuba yelled to Tristan, who was driving.

After staring blankly out the window for what felt like ages, Mokuba shouted "There!" loudly, scaring everyone in the car.

Kaiba was on the side of the road, dressed in his hillbilly attire, followed by Alister and Duke.

Mokuba ran out of the bus as fast as he could. "Seto!"

"Yes, are you going to the reunion?" Kaiba asked with a dopey grin.

"No Seto! And neither are you! There is no reunion."

"Nonsense" Kaiba said.

"Desperate times call for desperate measures..." Mokuba muttered, dissapearing into the bus. He came back with a frying pan and bashed Seto smartly across the face.

Kaiba no longer thought he was a hillbilly, but he was still not normal.

They all clambered into the bus, including Alister and Duke.

Now of course, since they took a road trip, and this is a story, the bus has to break down, and it did so.

"Not good." Yami commented, who was facing the after math of his sugar rush frenzy.

"Uh-oh... I forgot to bring Seto's wallet!" Mokuba moaned. "He never takes it himself." He added.

"I don't have money!" everyone else said in unison.

"Even more not good." Yami said, earning blank looks.

"Well, I guess we'll just have to go to the rest stop down the street." Mokuba said.

Yami left for the bathroom and the rest looked around.

"Look at this!" Duke said excitedly. He was holding an advertisement for a sort of talent show they were having. You had to sing and dance, and the winner got money.

"I'll do it!" Alister said.

"I'll do it!" Duke said.

"I'll do it!" Kaiba said, but his face faltered. "There's a minimum of four people." Kaiba read.

Bakura, Tristan and Joey said at the same time "Not me!" Then, as fate would have it, Yami returned the bathroom.

"What?" Yami asked, seeing the look Kaiba, Alister, and Duke were giving him.

They handed him the page.

"No." Yami said, reading it. The three simply nodded at him. "NO." he said louder.

But it was too late. Yami was about to be their fourth member.

Kaiba, Alister, and Duke decided to do "Tearin' up my Heart" by N'sync. **  
**  
"I'd never do N'sync! The Backstreet Boys are so much better! I MEAN- Like I care what song we do..." Yami said, eyes shifting uneasily.

They stood in formation as the music started, starting to dance in a very boy band-ish style.

Duke seemed to be thoroughly enjoying himself as he lead the song "Baby, I don't understand just why we can't be lovers, things are getting out of hand…"

Joey was literally rolling on the floor, once again, laughing.

"This is good!" Tristan chortled.

Mokuba looked embarrassed and Bakura looked uncomfortable.


End file.
